It’s-a me, Mayro.

The last Illumination film I watched period, let alone in theaters, was The Lorax from 2012. So I haven’t exactly had the greatest desire to watch the Super Mario Bros. movie despite reviews from viewers and critics painting it as a decent film. I’ve got too much shit to watch, like Children of the Corn. But after watching The Super Mario Bros. Movie, I can honestly say that it is a decent film. More than that, it’s a very well made film.

Super Mario Bros. stars Chris Pratt as Mario, and what can I say about Chris other than…whatever. Chris Pratt wouldn’t be a good Mario voice, but there’s something about the way Mario is built in this film that the voice kinda works. At the very least while it was a big shocking at first my brain settled into it within a few minutes of the film starting and after that I didn’t really notice it much. The same can be said for much of the cast. They aren’t fantastic, but with how the characters are built for the movie they fit the roles pretty well.

 

Mario and Luigi (Charlie Day) are two plumbers in Brooklyn who find themselves transported to the Mushroom Kingdom just in time for Princess Peach (Anya Taylor-Joy) to be setting on an expedition to head off Bowser (Jack Black) who has control of the Super Star and wants to rule the universe. Also he wants to bang Princess Peach. Accompanied by Toad (Keegan-Michael Key), they set off to meet with Donkey Kong (Seth Rogen) and Cranky Kong (Fred Armisen) to get the power of the Kong army.

Cranky Kong played by Fred Armisen? I don’t know why he went with Bernie Sanders style of elderly Jewish man for the role. But I enjoy Fred Armisen in just about everything he does.

The Super Mario Bros. Movie is a great way of finding the joyless critics on Rotten Tomatoes since a lot of the top critics seem to be angry about the fact that this movie was made for fans to enjoy. It’s no shock that the film is pulling in a 95% viewer rating while the critics sit at 58% while the cultural disconnect between movie snobs and the general audience only gets worse.

And for what it’s worth the film is packed to the brim with bottles full to the ass with nostalgia and easter eggs and references. It seems tailor built for lazy YouTubers whose careers ride on making “200 things you missed in the Mario Movie!” But for general audiences and fans of Mario there’s a lot to see and say “hey I recognize that.” From Mario’s old boss being from the Wrecking Crew to the Jump Man arcade machine, the billion references strewn about the world. It’s all a mishmash of nostalgia.

If there’s one thing I can say to criticize The Super Mario Bros. Movie it’s that the film really tries to get all your nostalgia balls tickled and it may be too much for a 90 minute film. And I’m not even talking about the background references, but tossing in everything from Smash Bros. to Mario Kart to various other Mario games. I’m honestly shocked they didn’t take some time to throw in some Mario Party or Mario Tennis, but I suppose those were really cut for time.

But it is an enjoyable movie throughout, despite the plot being a retread of every Illumination or Sony Pictures Animation film where the premise boils down to the protagonist being told they can’t do something only to do it anyway. It helps that headliners like Jack Black have charm out the wazoo, and even Seth Rogen wasn’t that bad as Donkey Kong. At least I was wrong in my prediction that he’d make a joke about smoking bananas. Did you know Seth Rogen smokes weed? It’s his main personality trait alongside…uh…

At the very least you knew Nintendo and likely Illumination would never allow this to become another vanity project for shitty writers where Peach would be a girlboss and the film would crap on Mario for being problematic. Peach is a bad ass in this film but it does make sense, and she ultimately doesn’t steal the spotlight from Mario. This being a Mario movie and all.

There’s also a plethora of options for spin-off movies, chief among which is Luigi’s Mansion. I hope Illumination doesn’t do the whole cinematic universe thing at at most goes for a shared universe with completely separated stories. I’d like to see a Mario Party film done by the same people and I’ll even laugh at the throwback where Mario injures his hands on the tug-o-war mini-game. If there’s a Mario 2 without Wart I’m going to be less than pleased. Wart can be played by Vin Diesel.

Rating: B+